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  • Writer's pictureVicki Ryan

Outsmart Your Inner Saboteur

What do self-sabotage, doubt, and insecurity have in common?

They drain.

They diminish.

They impact our ability to be great, to feel great, and to show up great.

If you’re experiencing any of it, maybe, like me, you thought this wasn’t even a thing for someone over 60, or 50, or 40, or 30! Was I living under a rock to get to age 62 and not know that I’d be experiencing all the above?

But I wasn’t living under a rock. I was growing my career with amazing jobs, surrounded by many remarkable people, getting a later-in-life undergraduate degree (oldest in my class), then an even later MBA (second-oldest this time), launching successful networking groups, volunteering, and becoming physically fit.

I was married, raising five remarkable kids, happy with high energy. I doubled my salary in less than six years.

Doesn’t all that sound like success? Yes!

But truth is, it doesn't always look and feel like success. And the problem is, NO ONE TALKS about that part! We don’t talk enough about the challenges, the crap, the issues, the concerns.

Talk therapy is real. So let’s talk it! To start, let's get clear on the terminology...

  • Self-sabotage: Being “behind the scenes”; Not taking great care of ourselves

  • Doubt: Allowing negative thoughts;

  • Insecurity: Thinking others in the room are smarter, quicker, “more strategic”

Dealing with these real feelings triggered by real scenarios is not easy, but there are some steps to take that will minimize the severity, length and impact.

1. Start each day aware of your energetic self.

  • What is your energy level? (anabolic or catabolic)

  • What will you do to launch well today? (what you wear, what you eat…)

  • How will you sustain your energy? (pulse checks, adjustments)

2. Throughout the day, listen to and observe yourself, and how others are responding to you.

  • What are you experiencing?

  • What is going well? What could be better?

  • What goals have you set for each interaction or meeting?

3. End your day with a brief self-assessment.

  • How do you feel?

  • What successes did you have?

  • What challenges are on your plate and need energy and focus tomorrow?

Managing your energy is all about building awareness of YOU and your fabulous self. Let yourself be FABULOUS. Feeling fabulous is a combatant against doubt, insecurity, and self-sabotage.

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